Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize
