woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
this boner is exhausting
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Randomize