we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
