Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
