so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
