Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
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