No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
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