I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize
