Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Randomize
