My balls are so social today.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
