Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
