just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Randomize
