just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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