I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Randomize
