Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize
