So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
