just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
you will always have a special place in my vag
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
