I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Randomize
