I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
