O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Randomize
