I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Randomize
