Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
vagina is talking i cant
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
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