Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
