just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Randomize
