So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
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