But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize