Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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