I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
I'm at about main and main street
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
