Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
this will be a night to untag.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
You can't just leave with hair like that
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Randomize
