Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
i would one night stand the shit outta him
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
