is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Randomize
