I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
i think i have two assholes
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Randomize
