You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
Swine flu is the new snow day.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
Randomize
