Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
