im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
