i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
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