Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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