I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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