he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
not ubering you a puppy
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
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