So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
Randomize
