Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
Randomize
