I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
