Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
you guys were way drunker than both of me
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
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