If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
they're like a gay fantastic four
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize