after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Success! We fucked roommates!
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
