2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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