Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
did i just pee glitter
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Randomize
