Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
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