I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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