she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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